Balancing it All

one of the hardest things that I am still learning

Something that I’ve always struggled with is trying to find time for all of the things that I do. Work life balance and time management have been the banes of my existence for as long as I can remember. As someone who turns to work when in the throes of mental illness, I existed in a two-way switch: diving head first into extremely rigid schedules or have such horrible bouts of depression from burnout. I didn’t prioritize any form of self-care for years. What did that look like? Staying up all night to finish assignments I had months to do, isolating myself for days at a time, sleeping too much at times, admittedly drinking more than I need to on my breaks, and not prioritizing eating enough.

Before recently, I thought my brain was broken.

After realizing that I might have ADHD and doing a lot of Google and social media searches, I realized that I need to work with my brain instead of against it. I’ve been working with my therapist for the past few years on improving my mental health and relationship with work and play. I made it so that I have a guideline schedule where I have a plan for my days to establish a routine for myself that’s easy to follow.

Schedules, planners, and checklists may be your friend!

Me and my therapist have also worked hard to limit rigidity in my life where necessary. My schedule looks like a designated time for school work, household chore days (what to do and when), and building in time to workout. I’ve seen that a dopamine release comes from me doing checklists and checking off things when I’m done. I tend to do a checklist on days where either I’m especially busy and need not forget anything, or I am feeling especially unmotivated and I don’t know where to start.

Another great tool that my therapist has provided me with is the question, “what’s so special about now?” To provide some context, this was in response to me feeling that I have to tackle everything, everywhere, all at once. As I’ve come to find, graduate students in their later years of their matriculation experience this pressure constantly. It’s stress and anxiety-inducing. If it’s not one thing it’s another: conference papers, publications, research projects, collaborative research spaces, dissertation work, classwork, and a laundry list of other things. Therefore, my therapist said that question and it really resonated with me.

What is so special about now?

It’s a prioritizing tool. when I start feeling the world crumbling around me and I can’t see the light at the end of my task list. I ask myself that question and if my answer is something along the lines of “nothing,” then I worry about something that has a higher priority or pressing deadline. This has been so useful for me to make sure I prioritize self-care in as many facets I can.

April is Move More Month.

Take care of yourself, supply yourself with Vitamin D outside, and get those feel good endorphins pumping through your system. I know I’ve been doing walking challenges outside and exploring new places in my city. Won’t you join me? 🙂